i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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