I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
