just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Randomize
