Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
Mom said you looked used
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Randomize
