summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
