she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
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