evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Randomize
