Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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