thus making me awesome and them whores
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
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