Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
True strength comes from lack of pants
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize
