Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
