I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
