Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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