Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
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