It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize
