K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
