This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Randomize
