you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
