I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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