I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
