U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
