The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
He keeps bees of course he's weird
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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