So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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