yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
