OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Randomize
