If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Randomize
