Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
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