i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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