all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
