she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
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