Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Randomize
