My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
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