i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
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