Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
