did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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