Fine. I'll sleep in my office
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Randomize
