I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
