Moan for me like Helen Keller
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
