the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
I think my vagina is haunted
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
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