There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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