Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
