He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
