I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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