i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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