My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
