I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize