I like to think it a success when the cops are called
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
Randomize
