I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
