I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
