It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Less talking, more tequila
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Randomize
