i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
